Funeral Prayers

Next week I will be involved in leading part of a funeral. It will not be the whole service - just a prayer and possibly a reading - but it is necessary I begin to gain experience in leading funerals.

I have drafted a couple of prayers of approach, based on, but heavily adapted from, the Book of Common Order. Partly for the occasion, but also to begin to have a pallet of prayers I can use in a variety of circumstances. So far, I have drafted one for a funeral of a church member and one for a parish funeral (for want of a better phrase). But I did think, why did I feel the need to make them different? On one hand I am aware there will be funerals I will take purely because the deceased lived in the parish and there is no connection at all with the church. On the other hand, I believe Jesus Christ came to the world for everyone, irrespective of their personal beliefs, background etc. So, am I making the wrong decision having different prayers?

Then, there's the subject of language. Should I use inclusive language such as us and our, rather than you and yours? Though the funeral is an act of worship, I see my role as much one of supporting the bereaved as leading the act of worship. Could including myself be seen as inappropriate by the mourners?

At the end of the day, when I will lead a funeral service I am acting as a representative of the church. In doing so, I am showing the church care for the mourners and, in turn, that God cares for them. If I can do that in the prayers I have drafted and how I lead them, I hope I will have done that.