Children's addresses ideas

I watched this and thought a few of them could be turned into children's addresses. So, I thought I'd share (and put it here so I would remember!).

It's a confidence thing

I had my supervision the other day and a couple of things which came out of it was regarding my visit to the school last week and my children's address on Sunday past. He'd been in the school and was asking the teacher for feedback.

Generally, it was okay. Once I got into my stride, I was seen to be comfortable and confident with the children. I responded well to them and had a good rapport with them. The teacher did think I would do something a bit different from what she would have done. That's reasonable enough, but I wasn't sure at all about the line which I should take – it's not like this is a church and I was all too aware I needed to find a good balance in what I said. Also, I just followed her pattern as I thought that was what was required. Next time, I'll prepare my own material and run with that. That's definitely a confidence thing, but it was only the second time I've been in school since I was a pupil. Oh, and I made the cardinal mistake of turning to look at the powerpoint. Given the position of the IT equipment in the class, it wasn't easy to do anything else if I wanted to see what was on the screen, but I maybe looked too long.

As for my children's address, well, the feedback for that wasn't exactly favourable. Bottom line was I allowed a child to talk too much and it didn't flow well. Funny, other feedback I received, though mixed, did not agree with that. At the time I was doing the address, the child who was talking gave me a gift, which I should have had the confidence to run with. That way my including them wouldn't have looked like a bit of a red herring. Definitely need to work on this confidence thing - in my own abilities as well as anything else. Strange, but almost anywhere but Eagleside I would have done that. I think it's knowing I am being critiqued while there and that I have to do the children's address in a position I am completely uncomfortable with.

Just before I had to leave, my supervisor told me that children's addresses were definitely something I will need to work on. Fair enough, as he hasn't got anything to work with except what he's seen. He also said I needed experience with children, even though I have told him I was a young church leader for 10+ years and a youth club leader for 8+ years. Also, this in the context of giving me feedback that I engage well with children and have a good rapport with them. Err, that doesn't make sense to me. That did annoy me, as the development point seems to contradict, to a certain extent, feedback I receive from my supervisor.

The good thing is my next placement has a lot of children and, having seen my future supervisor in action, I can learn a lot there about how to get this nailed. It's really important to me that I get the children engaged in worship and feeling that they are important and valued by the church community. Getting the children's addresses right forms an important part of that.

Learning by my mistakes

I always used to think I was okay at children's addresses. Still a work in progress, but (looking to the plant world for inspiration) good stock on which to grow and graft things. Now, I'm not too sure.

I've now lead the children's address at Eagleside twice now. There the children are primarily quite young, with a few older children (though I think they are all primary school aged). As with many churches, the numbers vary Sunday by Sunday, with the most I've seen in my time there being around 10.

This makes it quite challenging, along with me going in quite cold, as far as those children are concerned. Although I have been involved in worship most Sundays since beginning my placement, it has generally been after the children have left, so I am the weird woman talking to them once in a blue moon.

I usually try to used a physical object or a video clip to get things going. Hopefully that gets and holds their attention. From the body language both times, that seems to be the case, so that's positive. My problem, though, has been transferring from that illustration to the "God message", so to speak. That I'm struggling with and I wish I could get to the bottom of why.

I think it's a combination of not having full notes (don't want to just read to the children, but need somewhere to go from) and although I have it clear in my head (or at least I think I do) when those wee faces look at me, but don't speak I get in a tizz and fluster myself and don't make my point very clear. Perhaps, too, I'm trying to go too deep and am relying on the children having knowledge from their young church time they don't actually seem to have.

I think I need to keep it more simple. Today was about John  the Baptist and I think I should have just told a story about him and left it at that, rather than trying to link it to a "be excellent to each other" message. But then I don't want to patronise the children either. Mmmh, more practice needed me thinks.

On a positive note, a member of the congregation (who I think was a visitor) was asking how long it was since I had started training. I explained it Eagleside was my first placement and I'd been there 10 weeks. He thought I was doing very well for someone who was less than 3 months into my training. I thanked him kindly. I hadn't thought of it like that, and I was getting a bit overawed by all the stuff I'll need to experience before I (God willing) get my own charge. That gentleman's comments certainly put things in perspective and reminded me of a comment a good friend had made to me a few weeks back - "Don't beat yourself up too much. It's a lot to take in and it will be challenging, but that's why it's years of training and you know it's the right path for you". How true. And I need to learn and take heed of my own advise that we learn from our mistakes.

I hope this weakness can grow into a strength. Then the failures will have been the most beneficial.

A wee bit nervous

I've been gently broken into the various aspects of worship at Eagleside. This is allowing me to get a feel for the church - it's congregation, sound system, style of worship etc - and for the congregation to get used to me and my voice. On Sunday, it was my turn on the children's address.

I've had the idea of this address for years, but it's never fitted in with the theme of any services I've been involved with since I came up with the idea. Basically, I described the safety features of my biker kit and used that as a lead into the armour of God.

Things which didn't go well.

I was nervous. I'm always nervous, but usually manage to cover it up to an extent - being behind the lectern or in the pulpit helps. That's not something you can do with children and they notice and I don't do bull with children (don't really do it at all, but especially not with children). They were nervous too, this strange woman with weird clothes.

I made the mistake of following the pattern that other worship leaders at Eagleside take, which is to sit on a chair, with the children at my feet. Didn't like that as I felt I was talking down to them. I do not talk down to children, literary or metaphorically. Next time,. I'll either sit on the floor with them or get them to sit on the front chairs so we're on a level.

I possibly didn't make the link from the motorbike clothing armour  to the armour of God that well. Need to think a bit more like a child on that and get into the mindset of the children at Eagleside. I suppose I'm a bit too used to children who get the connections themselves, but that may be down to what's going on in their Sunday School.

I spoke a wee bit faster than normal. Partly nervousness, partly forgetting though I was speaking to children, the congregation needs to hear. That said, Rebecca who is deaf, heard it all. I do need to remember to slow the pace for the grown-ups, though.

Things which went well:

I held their attention. They were interacting and giving of positive listening. This was confirmed by a primary teacher in the congregation, who mentioned how impressed she was with my being able to hold their attention and the imagery I used. That was a great boost.

The message worked well and tried on with the service as a whole. I can't stand when that doesn't happen.

I didn't ramble on and on. I realised when it was time to stop and I did so. I'm glad nerves didn't make me ramble on too much and need rescued!

My coolness factor with the children has gone up. Most children think motorbikes are cool. Not sure how the parents react...

So, I need to be aware of this and try to find my way of presenting children's addresses, rather than following the style in the placement. After all, I am supposed to be finding my style. Fortunately, my supervisor is not only happy I do that be positively encouraging me. It also helps Eagleside has a lot of students at varying stages in training and enquiry, so they are used to new things. Now is the time to try.

Don't just talk to the children

The children's address today was about the prodigal son. I was at a loss for an idea until yesterday afternoon, when my hubbie suggested I started with "are you pleased to see me?". Then, I add on other statements, making the prospect of them being pleased to see me less and less appealing.

Giving the reaction of the children, the address went well. They interacted with me, answered my questions, almost laughed at my jokes and asked their own questions. All very encouraging.

After the service, the session clerk came to me, a bit worried. He hoped I wouldn't be offended by what he had to say. This had me a little concerned, as it takes a lot to offend me. Apparently, I'm speaking a little too fast during the children's address, so those with hearing issues are slightly struggling. I thanked him for letting me know. How am I going to know I'm not getting the message to all the congregation if no-one tells me?

I must remember, though I'm talking with the children, the children's address forms part of the service so it is important everyone can hear this. I will bear this feedback in mind for next time.

Same talk, different reactions

I was doing the children's address at both my home church and its linkage. The linkage came first and I feel it went well there. I got the message across well and had a bit of interaction with the (two) children there.

It was okay, but could have been better at my home church. There were about 15 children there yesterday and a fair few don't know me as they've started coming (or come back) during my 2 placements. Because I didn't know the children, I couldn't get the same interaction as I did at the linkage (I pretended to ignore one of the children). I think I should have prepared a volunteer to help with this and not necessarily a child.

No much to worry about, but I know I need to be aware of this.

Random thoughts from yesterday

Yesterday was, from my prospective, quite an interesting day in terms of what I did and observed and others reactions to me.

One of the ladies I visited the other week was at my placement church. It was great to see her, but that wasn't why seeing her was special - no, it was her genuinely being pleased to see me. We hugged (which isn't like me at all) and, although not much more than the pleasantries were exchanged verbally, much more went on in our exchange which could be put into words.

During the service I was leading the children's address. It was pretty much me telling a story and linking it to the message - bad things happen that can't be explained, but whatever is happening in your life try to do good things. I wasn't sure how well it had went down as it was quite a "big" topic and pretty deep theology even for me (because I'm just soo experienced!). I knew my delivery was okay, but I wasn't too sure how it had gone, in terms of the message. After the service 2 people commented how much they'd enjoyed my address. That gave me a real lift and reassured me I was on the right track.

After the service I had a brief meeting with my assessor to go over my order of service. She told me the themes for Advent and apologised for not giving me them before - I told her I should have asked. She gave me some advice for the children's hymn. It's one I'm not familiar with, but the children at my placement church apparently really like it and, given the words, it ties in with the theme of my children's address. On the back of the meeting I've changed a couple of the hymns and chosen a couple of backups, in case.

My placement church holds an annual bereavement service and that was yesterday afternoon. All families and friends of those of the church and parish which my assessor has conducted their funeral service over the last year are invited. It's a short service with 3 hymns, a couple of readings, prayers and a reflection. During the service the bereaved are invited to place a tag (which they were given when they came in) with a message or the name of their loved one on budded branches which will be kept in the church until mid-January. I thought this was a great bit of symbolism, especially as apparently the buds usually are in leave by the time the display is removed.

After the act of worship, light refreshments were served. I noticed the bereaved person I had visited. I sat with them and another couple after the service. I was really nice to see the person I had visited and see how he was getting on, now the shock was wearing off.

So, what did yesterday show me? What I hope it's shown me is my nature allows me the privilege of being able to be there for people when they really need someone. To, through my actions and words, show God's love to those who need it most and, hopefully, draw them nearer to God. That is what I am called to do and why God has called me.

Children's addresses, Tea and Coffee

My first children's address at my placement was an experience. I was pretty nervous as, although I'm settling in well to my placement, it was something new there.

After my introduction of thought a few weeks ago, my assessor had suggested to just have notes for the message I want to make and ad-lib, rather than read the whole thing out. I took this bit of advice on board, though I'm not sure how well it went!

The Living Stones recourses my placement used are pretty comprehensive, to the point where I wouldn't have needed to do anything but gather some items and turn up. For children's addresses in particular that doesn't fit in with my style. Also, yesterday's address suggestion involved setting up a treasure hunt and I had been warned the children at my placement don't do "audience participation", so to speak.

The first question I asked of the children got me blank looks. I was sort of prepared for this, so I asked the congregation…blankness. Okay, that's the way it is. So, my questions became rhetorical. I'm not used to this, but if needs must and all that. I found out later it's like that with everyone. Good, it wasn't just me.

I think I broadly got the message across, but I'm not sure how my ending was. It seemed a little abrupt as I just finished my sentence and announced the next hymn. I think I need to work on that.

Rather than sit through the rest of the service, I went out with the children to see church from their perspective. All the children appear around the same age (apart from the teenagers, but they help), so the lesson was the same for everyone. This fitted on well with the children's address and, I assume, the rest of the service. Strangely, all of the Sunday School are girls, which is a pity, but without a critical mass of boys a new boy probably wouldn't want to go. That's just the way boys and girls of a certain age are, unfortunately.

The Sunday School's annual forum was on during the lesson. This involved 3 elders being quizzed by the children. I liked this idea, but felt the lesson and the forum shouldn't be going on simultaneously. Concentrate on one thing at a time.

As usual, I stayed for tea after the service. I noticed one member, who is also blind, was sitting alone. I got his coffee and sat with him until his carer can to collect him. We didn't chat too much - he's painfully quiet - but we exchanged the usual weather etc. I also checked he was happy for me to sit with him, which he was. I think even though he wasn't saying much, he appreciated someone just being there. I hope so.

So, that's it for yesterday. Not much to do this week. Somehow I'm not even involved in worship next week. Not entirely sure how that happened, but I've contacted my assessor to volunteer.

Week Four

Yesterday, I did my first children's address at my placement church and must admit I was a little nervous. Yes, I've done a few at my home church, but I know the children and they know me. On the other hand, I chose an address I'd used before in a variety of situations (youth club with 60 P7s being 1) and it had always gone down well with both the kids and grown-ups.


It didn't go too well, but not awful either. It was very difficult getting anything out of the children. I know they don't know me and at my home church the children are quiet with a visiting minister, but this lot barely speak - even to the "normal" minister (my supervisor). I don't know, but I have the impression they aren't used to very interactive children's addresses and are expected to "sit there and be quiet. I suppose I'm used to children that aren't afraid to speak. I'll have to work on them. They'll come round.


I was a little disappointed that my supervisor didn't discuss the address with me. He's going on holiday, so or next meeting isn't for over 2 weeks. A little late for constructive criticism. Also, he did kind of thank me, but in a sort of half shout across a hall. He may have thought I was leaving (I was only nipping to the loo), but he could have come across to speak to me. I'm not sure if I'll bring that up at our meeting or let it drop. Possibly let it drop.

During my last 3 Sundays, there has been something I've thought odd about my placement church, but couldn't put my finger on it. Everyone is welcoming etc, but there's something missing. Yesterday, I think I worked out the little things that make a difference.

1. I've been trying to sit in a different area of the church every week, so I can "get to know" a variety of people. I'd got there early yesterday, so no-one was near where I was sitting when I took my pew. A woman sat behind me and only acknowledged my presence when I said Good Morning to her. I tried to make a little small talk (nice weather type of thing), but it was pretty clear she didn't want to talk. Fair enough, I don't know her, so there could have been something in her life that meant she didn't want to do small talk. Then her friend sat beside her and they chatted like no-one's business. Some of their chat was "examining" the worthiness of people locally.
2. As I was leaving the worship area after the service, I noticed a lady struggling with a glass of water, her hymn books, walking stick and handbag. About 5 people had walked past her struggling and not one of them offered help. I asked if she wanted some help and she was really pleased of the assistance.
3. Two members received long service certificates during the service. I think I talked to those ladies more than the minister or most of the congregation afterwards.
4. There are teas and coffees after the service and the minister and family always sit at the same table. No-one else will sit at that table until they are there. Very strange and I don't like it. I will bring that up at my next meeting, but will have to find a diplomatic way of putting it...

As you can see, there's a few things that don't seem right. There's outward friendliness, but no notice of people needing help. I know I notice things other people don't, but not offering someone help with their stuff when they are obviously struggling is bang out of order, if you ask me.

I had said to my husband that I thought my placement church need shaken-up, but I didn't realise how much. I wonder how much of an impact I can have on their attitudes in 7 months? Watch this space...