My 'present address' went okay. As it's the first time I've done anything like that there's definitely room for improvement. Think it's one of those things which I'll be best able to do when I really know a congregation.
I did it a wee bit different, beginning with inviting the congregation to go and say 'Merry Christmas' to someone they hadn't done so. Must admit, that was a bit of an interesting spectator sport, as there was a visitor who didn't get acknowledged and the praise band didn't move from where they were (wish I'd noticed at the time...I think I would have commented). Then, I invited the congregation to share something about the gifts they'd received and/or what they were doing for the rest of the day with someone the weren't sitting with. While that was happening, I went and spoke to the visitor. (It was an interesting discussion, especially as that was the second time in 5 days someone has asked if I was the minister, when my supervisor was there too. Suppose it's really affirming that strangers are seeing it in me, but it also convinces me it's important for many visitors they know who the minister is.)
I then went and talked to a couple of members and the children about what they'd received. That was the first time I've spoken to the children at Caledonia Kirk during an act of worship, as there's not usually a children's address. I think no one got what they were expecting. For me, it was a good compromise between acknowledging people (especially the children) will want to bring their presents to church, but not have every present discussed with 'the minister'. It also got the congregation talking and engaging as a community. That, I believe, is an important element of what church should be.
Afterwards, not much was commented on about what I'd done, but that's not unusual at Caledonia Kirk. One member of the congregation did tell me he really liked what I'd done, as everyone was included and no one would have felt awkward for not having a present with them. It was good to hear that, as that was part of the idea.
We do a similar kind of thing in a Morecambe & Wise style ( if you're old enough to remember them!) and have done as long as I've been attached to old congregation where we show a gift we've received usually something humorous then go round the kids in the congregation having a play with their presents. Funnily enough I took the youngest child who didn't feel she'd been welcomed! Am gutted at that but does show the need to make sure everyone is welcomed. It was encouraging to see one or two families of funerals I'd conducted over past year. It's nice to make Christmas service a bit different and user friendly. All part of the Learning experience:)
ReplyDeletecan be a tricky one tho...asking what they got/ what they'll be doing: might get some unexpectedly uncomfortable answers!
ReplyDeleteHow do we 'include' those who are bereaved/ caring for a loved one who is slowly disappearing via dementia, or who is terminally ill/ is seriously ill themselves/ or who has no family...is alone? Folks for whom Christmas might not be, as the song goes, 'the most wonderful time of the year'?
And for me, weirdly, on both a personal and 'work' level: I think I've come to the stage where my most favourite services around this time of year tend to be the 'longest night' or 'blue Christmas' services - but hey, I prefer funerals to weddings as well!!
In the innumerable 'what-if's' category...
it may be tricky for that person who knows they are going to go home to their empty house and spend the rest of the day by themselves to share that info with their pew neighbour. This, regardless of the person being quite comfortable with it or not, does seem to become a problem for the one who hears that 'you're spending Christmas all by yourself?' and looks horrified/ pitying/ insert other emotional response here.
I wonder if it is actually possible to include every single person... and increasingly think that it probably isn't and ponder what might be the best way forward when it comes to worship? I also suspect that no matter what you try to do, there will always be those innumerable 'what-if's' - and maybe if we worry about them too much, they will suffocate everything? Hmmmm... dunno.
Perhaps all we can really do is make sure when folk come through the door that they are made welcome, however the actual service takes shape itself?
And think we've blethered about this before: I also think we [and I mean the whole church community here] possibly demand way too much out of one hour on a Sunday, to meet every one of the needs and expectations around worship....
*wanders off, stage left, scratching head, thinking of at least 6 impossible things before breakfast"
Most of what you've said I explained to my supervisor were among my reservations for having a presents service. But, if there's children there, they will want to share something of what they've got.
DeleteA bit of me thinks how it's handled is as much about knowing the congregation as much as anything else. The way I did this allowed me to talk to the person who was on his own. If I'd been doing the whole talk myself, I couldn't have talked to them. We never know how these seemingly irrevelant conversations can touch people's lives.
And I think I'm with you. I'm not a huge fan of weddings (except my own, but it was unique!).