Seen and reported on

Well, the paperwork for this placement has been done. Generally it's good, though it really shows not just what I've learnt, but just how much I still have to learn! (Though I am very aware of that).

There are a couple of things which I'm not sure where my supervisor got them from and I was a wee bit put out, but he's got to base his report on what he's actually seen. Mainly, the potential 'issues' are around leadership and dealing with conflict, which I hadn't had any experience in during this placement. There' also experience with children, but I expected that and had put that on my form.

These are things I need to keep in mind during my next placements and fin ways to show and develop my leadership in all circumstances. Hopefully, I'll get the chance with the next placement to begin to address the issues and continue to develop in all aspects of ministry, so I may become the best I can be.

Selection conference - the paper work

Given time is pressing on towards selection conference, I was starting to wonder when the additional information would come. This arrived yesterday.

From comments some of you have left on my blog (thank you), combined with the timetable I received when my place was confirmed, I wasn't surprised by much of the contents. The detail of the medical report was pretty surprising, though I'm not sure why. Many employers have this. Strangely, just over a year ago all the the questions asking about health issues and hospital treatment, I would have answered to the negative. Now I have to explain about my broken clavicle - joy! But that's just by the by.

I suppose I'm most concerned about which topic to choose for the group discussion I will lead. I have an idea of an item which I think is an important matter the Kirk should at least talk about, but I wonder what other peoples thoughts are. It's not I want the answers or to nick others ideas - far from it - but I want to look outwith my own "rant issues" and maybe start a dicussion on something really important. If not really important, at least a discussion I can present well and where there will be a scope for debate/discussion.

I must admit, and I'll have to be aware of it during this time, I do have a habit of playing devil's advocate a lot. It might not be my opinion, but I will put it forward to get people to think about it and challenge me. Unfortunately, in the wrong context, that can be taken the wrong way. I suppose it's positive I can be like that. As some of you have commented on here, the selectors are looking for me, not someone else.

Overall, though, I'm still pretty relaxed about it. I doubt I'll still be so relaxed on the day, but I'm farily certain neither will the other 9 people getting their head read!

Scary stuff

Ministries council at Church of Scotland HQ (aka 121) have sent me a pile of paperwork.

Some is to do with my personal development interview (PDI) on Monday. That I was expecting, though I do not know what to expect (that sounds completely contradictory, doesn't it!). I will post how I got on after the event. I'm going with an open mind (and heart).

No, the scary stuff is:

• A form asking which of the assessment conferences I am able to attend. One step at a time guys; I'm only 1 month into my co-ordinated field assessment.
• An information leaflet about training for full-time ministry, containing advice to write to the Deans of Divinity at the various universities to apply for a place, if I wish to begin studies in 2009. Err, even if I get through my local review, that doesn't mean I'll get through the assessment conference.

It's not that I don't feel called. In fact, the deeper into this process I get, the more my sense of call grows. I feel I am pleasing God and He is supporting me at the moment, even when I don't think I can handle this.

My heart tells me I will get through all the hoops and will need a place at uni next year. My head tells me, be patient. You've waited this long another little while won't make any difference.

God might have other ideas, though...