As I mentioned here, my assessor passed me the details of a member of the ministries support team. I suppose a way to describe him is a minister to ministers.
He's a hard guy to get in touch with; it's the nature of his job. I finally spoke to him on Monday and arranged a meeting this afternoon. It was a good open, friendly and productive chat. It was also a bit challenging, but in a supportive and non-judgemental way.
My assessor hadn't told him anything about me, except I am currently an enquirer. He didn't even know which type of ministry I feel called to. So, a clean slate for me.
I told him of the healing service and my reaction to it, as the conversation I had later with my assessor regarding it was the trigger for our meeting. I also spoke of the bad reaction I had back at my last placement (see here).
I'm fairly sure I know the triggers for both instances. With the healing service, my personal experience with someone close to me suffering from depression. With the other meeting, the effects of bullying when younger.
I also explained I feel these experiences are all mirrors being held up before me. That God is holding up those mirror to allow me to really know myself and, through that knowledge, minister for Him.
He thought that was a really good way of looking at it (no pun intended there). He also told me many people in the enquiry process think the kirk is looking for full-formed minsters etc with total self-awareness and no growth necessary. I didn't think that for a minute, but it is reassuring to actually be told that.
He made a few suggestions for dealing with situations, such as the classic counting to ten before speaking, and reminded me there is often more than we see, both in situations and our reaction to them. The main tool I need to use for this journey is my journal. I need to write, read, reflect and learn through its use more.
Apparently he can recommend counselling and arrange it if he feels the person he's talking to needs it. He didn't feel I did. It's funny, there's a time when I would have baulked at the thought of counselling. Now, if I needed to do it in order to follow God's calling, I would do it if recommended.
At the end of meeting he told me if I needed any advice or to talk again just to get in touch with him. What a lovely man!
And, I have so much to learn and growth to do. Only by God's grace can I.
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