Out of the mouths of babes

A genuine conversation I overheard to day:

Mum: "I think I'll just try this cardigan on".
Daughter (around 10 years old): "That would suit Gran"
Mum and I exchange looks, where Mum has an expression of "Well, I won't be buying it now".
It was all I could do to stop myself from laughing.
Needless to say, Mum did not buy the cardigan!

Unitary constitutions

There seems to be a lot of churches moving towards having unitary constitutions. While I understand the reasons for this (less meetings; reduction in duplication of work; church trustees dealing with decisions etc), I have been concerned about how the change will impact on non-elder Congregational Board members.

The unitary effectively does away with the board and any business which was their remit (such as finance, property, fellowship) becomes the responsibility of the Kirk Session (I am going for a really basic overview here, so bear with me). There will be members of the board who, for what ever reason, are not members and, as such, not on the Kirk Session. Thus, they could attend Session meetings - they are public after all - they do not have a voice and cannot vote. While on the board, they would have these privileges.

So, how does a church, especially the session and minister, ensure the board members feel valued once their role goes when a church moves to a unitary constitution? I know there is the option of asking them to become elders, but not everyone can or wants to do that.

Is the movement to less meetings really a benefit (and I am playing devil's advocate here) if those who contributed well and effectively in one way are no longer included in decisions they were before (and may have been for years).

I'd imagine there's the possibility of asking former board members to be on a session committee and there they can be a part of the decision making process. When the matters from that committee are to be brought to the session, they attend to support the motion (or whatever) and be there to answer questions if required, much like the people who helped draw up stuff for General Assembly being there when it's presented, yet not having a vote. If done in the right way, this could benefit the whole church; handled badly and...well, that's not a very good sign of a church.

I hope, when I eventually get to the stage of these meetings, I can ensure all can contribute with what they can give and feel that contribution is valued, no matter what type of constitution the church uses. Mmmh, I think I'm reiterating another post...

God loves my enemies

I recently read Desmond Tutu's "God has a dream". It's a lovely short book written by a man for whom I have a great deal of respect and admiration. [I remember, seeing a news report when I was 7 or 8 - yes, I watched the news and read the papers then, I was a strange child. Desmond Tutu was the spokesperson for the boycott of South African goods. When my Mum went shopping I wouldn't let her buy things from South Africa, because Desmond Tutu said so.]. There was so much I could take away from the book. It's a positive, affirming book. So remarkable given some of what Desmond Tutu lived through.

I was especially struck by the phrase "God loves your enemies too". It's so obvious, yet so startling too. Of course, if God loves everyone, he loves people I struggle to love, who have hurt me or my family and friends in the past. Why that hadn't fundamentally occurred to me before, I have no idea. I suppose it was there, at the back of my mind (or should I say heart) somewhere.

I also found the expression so liberating. It makes me look at those who are my "enemies" (I use the phrase guardedly as I'd like to think I don't have any real enemies, just people who I need to show grace too better) in a very different light. How can I not? God loves them in the same way as he loves me. It is only right I attempt in all I do to show the love God has for me to those I struggle to love, as I am doing it for God. They are my neighbour and, as Jesus taught, I should "love my neighbour as myself".

It's not easy putting past hurts and let downs away. Sometimes it's necessary to open up wounds again to really get rid of the festering mess within and no one wants to do that, as the short term pain could be too great. Yet, I will try in all the ways I can to bring healing where I can and where God calls me to be. I am not perfect, not by a long shot, but I do try to love the Lord my God with all my heart, mind and strength. Loving my enemy is just part of that, I believe.

Getting watched

I led the whole service at Eagleside on Sunday. This is the second time I have done so there, but this time I was really being watched. There was the speech trainer from 121, spotthegerbil and my Mum. Most people thought I'd be especially worried about the speech trainer. Nah, much more pressure Mum being there.

But anyway, this is my professional reflection on the service, so lets concentrate on that.

My theme was a combination of  the ordinary made extraordinary and everyone having a calling. Generally, even I couldn't believe how well it went. I'm not perfect - far from it and still have so much to learn - but I'm definitely improving. And that's good. I'm training to learn my style, find my feet and improve - if none of that happens, then I am doing something very wrong and would not be engaging with the process. I've also now listened to the service, which is a useful and disturbing thing! I probably pick up on much more than even the most critical ear would from listening to myself!

I engaged well with the children and, taking on board criticism I've had for my last service, tried to extend the teaching point more. I hope I got the balance right there, but I don't want to tell them so much that there's nothing for the Young Church to tell them. I also feel I dealt well with the children who were going away with the talk (and some of their insight was brilliant - out of the mouths of babes). It's good to know they are starting to feel comfortable with me, as I am with them.

My prayers were well delivered, but the speech trainer thought I had strange pauses. Not convinced I agree with him and, as the delivery is similar to that I have used before at Eagleside which was encouraged and affirmed, I might just agree to disagree on that point.

During the sermon, I generally had a good range of tone and pace, but not too much that people would loose me. I did have a couple of asides which, to be honest, were more me thinking out loud and may not have been picked up very well. Need to be very aware of that and try to engage brain with mouth, which can be easier said than done sometimes! Some of my intensional asides didn't get a flicker of recongition from most of the congregation, but then I do have a very particular sense of humour. They are used to humour in the service, but mine is much more dry than my supervisors. Won't be so bad once I've built up a relationship with a congregation.

I tend to have notes as a comfort and, especially on Sunday, I didn't refer to them too much. I still need practice at this as there was a point where I might have sounded like I got myself in a fankle, but took a deep breath, sip of water, glanced at my notes and moved on. At  least having full notes for the prayers and sermon (yet not for the children's address - maybe there's something in that?) allows for that. It also gives my timings, as I know roughly how long I am going to talk.

Due to nerves, there were a couple of words I stumbled over. Funnily, I picked out different ones from the speech trainer. Generally, though, I was very clear with good diction.

The service did come together as a running theme, I feel. That is something I think it so important. As I've said many a time before, there's nothing worse than the children's address haveing nothing to do with the rest of the service. In those cases, I've tended to think it's like patting the children on the head before we get on with the real service!

All the hymns were quite long, which I hadn't really thought about when I chose them. May be worth keeping that in mind for future. That said, a member of the choir did thank me for choosing "such lovely hymns" fo them to sing. Glad to be of service!

Oh, and getting back to the sermon. I really couldn't believe what was going on. There I was, all passionate and animated at some points. Where did that come from? I remember thinking at the time. Of course, it's the holy spirit, but good grief, I never knew I had it in me! No, I didn't thump the pulpit! I'm not that way inclined!

So, overall, it went well. Still things to work on and be aware of. But I need those things so I never, ever get complacent.

And a closing word from a member of the congregation. "Sometimes I forget this is just the start of your training. You're very good. We're had probationers here who haven't been as good as that". Wow, looks like I have a gift. A wonderful gift from God. I pray I use it well.

Let them help

Anyone who's regularly read this blog (which I an always amazed that others do actually want to read my random opinions on a range of matters and my struggle and joy with this call God has given me, but I digress) will know I have a bit of a thing for social justice.

Now, I'm not talking about letting people away with not contributing to society - far from it - I am a great believer in helping people give what they can not what the society thinks it needs. Take church as an example. There's often voluntary vacancy comes up (and it's usually voluntary, that's the nature of the beast) for someone to take over doing a job that someone has done for ages. The people looking to fill that vacancy expect the new post holder to do exactly what the other person could do. Someone comes forward who can give something, but it's no as much or a different thing from what has come before. Sometimes, here's little room for compromise or looking at what the person coming forward has to give, even if is not perfect.The person rejected and their gift left unwrapped. They my even be put off attempting to step up to the plate again, all because people just see want the don't have to give, rather than don't.

Now, quite how I'd tackle this in "real" ministry,. I don't fully know. I'd hope I'd always find  way to use people who want to help, in whatever way. I hope I'd find a way to use their skills and encourage others to do likewise. Through that, I'd hope to give those who think they may not have anything to give the opportunity to see they have so much they can give and more. So, they feel valued and important and that they are contributing to society, in their own small way,