Going too well?

I can't believe I am almost 4 weeks into probation already. It just seems to have flown by (and I have a hunch the following 14 months 1 week will too!). Okay, so being in Malawi for the first 10 days, then having Summer Holiday Club the following week, did make the first 3 weeks quite intense. It'll be interesting to see how (or if) some sort of pattern develops over the coming months.

Airside is a big congregation, and the church is full on a Sunday (yes, even in the summer). It's great to see, but a little intimidating for me, as the last 3 churches I've served have had no more than 40 people of a Sunday morning (and even then, I struggled to remember all their names!). Quite how I'm going to manage at Airside, I have no idea.

Anyway, I am getting to know people. I've had some people to visit - and they have all been so welcoming and hospitable (though I also know, as one let slip, that The Boss had contacted them and asked them to be nice to me when I visited - I think I'm being broken in easily). Through the visits, I am finding the connections between people in the church and community. Some even know Spot, as he grew up in the town and used to be a member of the kirk. So there's that connection too.

Before the service, Laura will wait in the lobby to see who arrives, have a wee word etc. I mentioned I wasn't sure if I like this the other day, but the explanation made a lot of sense. Then, the more I thought about it, the more I realised that when I was serving Railway Crossing and Last Stop last summer, before the service I would say hello to people as they arrived, welcome visitors etc. So, maybe I do prefer doing that, I just had known everyone - what was going on in their lives and in the community - but don't know. I think, on reflection (I so had to get that in), it's being the newbie, knowing I'm being 'watched' and feeling a wee bit overwhelmed at the moment, rather than not actually liking it. Will see how things go today, though have the pressure of preaching today. Sure it'll be fine - God's got my back and, so far, I seem to be doing okay.

When I received feedback from The Boss, by way of what's known as supervision, I was waiting for the 'BUT.' You know, the feedback sandwich - good, bad, good. That didn't come. My prayer, which I'd sweated over was described as 'impressive - very impressive' (it was alright, I thought), as was my presentation and the way I've carried myself. And I managed to get on with everyone in Malawi. And I fitted on so well at Holiday Club that some people thought I'd been there for years. And I chat to people with ease at coffees after the service Etc, etc. I can't help but think that's what I am supposed to be doing.

I know I shouldn't be complaining, but I'm just not used to this. Besides, I've never been very good at accepting praise (I actually find it a bit embarrassing). Still, will see what comes out of my preaching when we have our next supervision session. I can't be wonderful all the time, but don't want to be rubbish just to get critiqued.

Today, though, I need to focus on preparing to preach for the first time at Airside. The sermon's written and printed out. I hope it ties in with the rest of the service (which The Boss is leading) and speaks God's word to the congregation.