Faith seeking understanding

Now, I am never going to be a great theologian. Reading some the greats my head starts to hurt (though I did have a tutor who told us that if your head doesn't hurt, you haven't read them!) and I just feel they are trying a wee bit too hard to put God in a box. But I still see it as necessary to have people in this world who are doing theology in an academic way - they, hopefully, help the rest of us know more about God and gain a better understanding on our relationship with him through Christ and our neighbour.

I know there are many times in these studies where I've wondered what the practical application of some of the stuff I've learnt is. It's not to be dismissive, far from it, but I'm trying to see the big picture. I don't want to get bogged down with academic study so it does not inform the other aspects of my training - placement and ministries training network. If that were to happen, then the three streams would run in parallel and would not be interwoven as, I believe, they should be.

Yet the things I am studying are helping me in all these parts of training. As someone who has been in the Kirk for 30+ years, I can't recall formally being taught much in the way of Christian doctrine (if any). It didn't need to be done formally, as I have (and will continue to) learn what this following of Christ really means. The bottom line for me is faith, and faith alone, though faith can seem empty to others without action (not that I am saying action is necessary to have faith, it's very confusing!).

The study is allowing me to know where these creeds and doctrines came from, how they developed and the rational behind them. It gives me a greater understanding of where I am coming from, allowing me to 'justify' (and I use that word very advisedly) my stance. It challenges me to really think what I believe, rather than just accepting what I have been taught. It allows me to gain insight into the theologies of those whose theologies differ from my own, making me more able to engage, work, learn from and empathise with them.

Surely, all of that is part of the point of doing a divinity degree? To gain an understanding of my faith in ways I never could in any other way. That said, some of the greatest theologians I have ever met left school with no qualifications, so I will never, ever dismiss another's theology just because I am 'educated'. That just would make me a tube, among many other things I couldn't publish here!