The first contract

Over this week, my supervisor and I have been putting together my learning and serving covenant - basically the contract for my time at Eagleside. It was a lengthy process primarily as I don't know what I don't know, with this being my first placement and only the beginning of my training. My supervisor was very helpful in guiding me in some of the aspects which totally bewildered me.

At the end of the form, there was a section for special interests. The ones I have put down are a bit vague and woolly - use of audio-visual in worship and something else which I can't really remember. Partly, it's I'm aware I have 3 placements and probation to cover the areas I want to explore, partly I don't want to take on too much this placement.

I suppose that's maybe wimping out a bit. But I have plenty time (though I suspect it will fly past!) and need to develop those skills as I am interested in them and I know I need a gentle start to training. I'm sure over the course of this an the other placements, other special interests will come to light or I will know there are things I need to explore. I may even find that in this placement I explore things I'd never even thought of and be better prepared as a result.

We've got Jesus

One of the courses I am taking is theology (mmmh, wonder why I might have to study that...). We've just had a change of lecturer and it's great. We've got Jesus now. And they are a fabby lecturer - we're all understanding it now, though it is a slightly different area that's being looked at (I think; I hope!).

An analogy they used yesterday was Jesus galloping along on his horse and rescuing humanity. And what entered my head? This:

Which did leave the song in my head for the rest of the day. More worryingly, though, was I knew it was Christmas number 1 in 1968 off the top of my head!

Star dust

As I was walking through Holyrood Park this morning, it was still dark o'clock. As it was a clear morning, in the sky I saw the stars rising above Arthur's Seat and thought wow.

Around 4.5 billion years ago, a star began forming from a cloud of dust, which had been formed from the death of another star. As the star formed, and gravity started to act, the dust cloud swirled around this new star, condensed and formed the planets around that star, bringing our solar system into being. So I and all people are made from star dust. Now, that's pretty cool.

I hate being late

Let's be frank. Yesterday was a shit day. Very busy, which I don't mind, but let down by poor time management, which I had little control over.

I observed a funeral, which was strange as it was a funeral where I did not know the person, though in ministry I'll have to get used to that. It did allow me to think about the service in ways I couldn't if I was emotionally involved, though it wasn't especially different from my expectations of a church funeral. After, I discussed it with my supervisor, as he knew the person well, and talked over the differing issues of knowing and not knowing the individuals we are called to serve, in this way.

That discussion took place while we were finishing off my paperwork for 121. Which started 20 minutes late - grrr. I know I need to find away of ensuring meetings are timeous as I'm aware if I don't get this sorted now I'll have problems later. I was also too polite, as I knew I needed to leave Eagleside promptly, as something urgent had cropped up for me, but didn't say anything and the meeting went on longer than I would have liked. So, in that instance, the time management was partly my issue too. I suppose I need to work out an exit strategy. Practice on my supervisor and, hopefully, when I am doing visits and have to be somewhere else I've already got that sorted.

Then, to make a busy day even busier, I had MTN (ministry training network) to rush off too. My day had been planned around this, as I knew I wouldn't be able to have tea, so had a large lunch. I was getting a lift from another member of the group. I waited. And I waited. And I waited. They didn't call and, unfortunately, I don't have their number. Eventually, I thought they weren't coming and I didn't have my own transport, but just as I had, they turned up. A mad dash to MTN  and we were only 25 minutes late.

MTN itself was good. It was great to meet with fellow candidates for the first time since conference and share experiences and thoughts, though the facilitator kept mentioning things which the group discussed the year before and the new members felt a little excluded. The main thing I picked up at MTN, though, was in the discussion, there wasn't much mention of God or Jesus. Should I be worried about this?


So, the lesson for the day - time management isn't entirely out of my hands. And don't rely on a lift without making sure the person picking me up knows where to go.

A wee bit nervous

I've been gently broken into the various aspects of worship at Eagleside. This is allowing me to get a feel for the church - it's congregation, sound system, style of worship etc - and for the congregation to get used to me and my voice. On Sunday, it was my turn on the children's address.

I've had the idea of this address for years, but it's never fitted in with the theme of any services I've been involved with since I came up with the idea. Basically, I described the safety features of my biker kit and used that as a lead into the armour of God.

Things which didn't go well.

I was nervous. I'm always nervous, but usually manage to cover it up to an extent - being behind the lectern or in the pulpit helps. That's not something you can do with children and they notice and I don't do bull with children (don't really do it at all, but especially not with children). They were nervous too, this strange woman with weird clothes.

I made the mistake of following the pattern that other worship leaders at Eagleside take, which is to sit on a chair, with the children at my feet. Didn't like that as I felt I was talking down to them. I do not talk down to children, literary or metaphorically. Next time,. I'll either sit on the floor with them or get them to sit on the front chairs so we're on a level.

I possibly didn't make the link from the motorbike clothing armour  to the armour of God that well. Need to think a bit more like a child on that and get into the mindset of the children at Eagleside. I suppose I'm a bit too used to children who get the connections themselves, but that may be down to what's going on in their Sunday School.

I spoke a wee bit faster than normal. Partly nervousness, partly forgetting though I was speaking to children, the congregation needs to hear. That said, Rebecca who is deaf, heard it all. I do need to remember to slow the pace for the grown-ups, though.

Things which went well:

I held their attention. They were interacting and giving of positive listening. This was confirmed by a primary teacher in the congregation, who mentioned how impressed she was with my being able to hold their attention and the imagery I used. That was a great boost.

The message worked well and tried on with the service as a whole. I can't stand when that doesn't happen.

I didn't ramble on and on. I realised when it was time to stop and I did so. I'm glad nerves didn't make me ramble on too much and need rescued!

My coolness factor with the children has gone up. Most children think motorbikes are cool. Not sure how the parents react...

So, I need to be aware of this and try to find my way of presenting children's addresses, rather than following the style in the placement. After all, I am supposed to be finding my style. Fortunately, my supervisor is not only happy I do that be positively encouraging me. It also helps Eagleside has a lot of students at varying stages in training and enquiry, so they are used to new things. Now is the time to try.